I'm so Excited! I'm so Excited! I'm so Scared!

Andrew and I have been keeping a little secret for the past few months. I'm PREGNANT! We told our parents when we first found out in November, but we waited to tell our families until Christmas. Yesterday we had our first Dr. appointment and we got to hear the heart beat. It was amazing hearing that little (although very quick) heartbeat. After we heard the heartbeat we just couldn't keep it a secret from anyone anymore and we started shouting it from the roof tops (aka Andrew posted it on Facebook). Since I was already 12 weeks when I went in for my first Dr. appointment the Dr. wanted us to get in and have an ultrasound this week so we could get one in the first trimester. So today we went in for the ultrasound and it changed our lives forever. 

Yep! That's right! TWINS!!!

When we went in for the Ultrasound the Dr. wasn't there it was just Andrew, I and the Tech. I told the tech we were way excited because this was our first ultrasound. When she looked at the screen she said "oh look I can see both of them"... so I said both of them? and she said yeah and she wrote twins up on the screen. I thought she was just being funny because she had made some other jokes earlier so I didn't believe her. She acted like everything was normal and then she kept talking about both babies and I was way confused so I asked her if she was joking, if this was just some kind of funny ultrasound tech joke to play on the newbies first ultrasound, but she wasn't. I was trying to wrap my head around it and I told her the Dr. didn't say anything to us about twins and she said they didn't tell her either. I think that's when she realized we didn't know we were having twins until she told us. I guess most people usually know they are having twins before they go in for the ultrasound, but not us. It was a HUGE surprise! Andrew was speechless  and I just couldn't stop staring at the screen at both my beautiful little babies!

 We got to see all four hands and four feet and two brains so we're off to a good start. The Ultrasound tech said that they are fraternal so no identical twins lucky for me and my sanity. Also, we could have a boy and girl! That's what I am hoping for, but as long as they are healthy I don't really care. So far they are doing really well. They are both 2 1/2 inches long one heart beat is 160 and the other is 165.

Everyone asks me how I feel about having twins, or how it feels to be having twins and I didn't know what to tell them because I couldn't describe the feeling, but I think I have found a way. The feeling I had today when I found out was the same feeling I felt when the pee stick came back positive both times. That feeling of oh my gosh! I am going to be a parent, i'm going to have a kid. Oh crap this is really cool, but oh no, can I handle this? Basically I'm super excited, I mean I am so excited, but I am so scared! I used to think that people who wanted twins were a little crazy and I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy. That's the attitude I had towards twins, nothing against them I just didn't want twins, ever! I told Andrew that if we ever had twins we'd give one away. So I guess it's a little ironic that I am having twins, but after seeing both of them today I couldn't imagine living without one of them and I want BOTH of them. It was literally love at first sight. I get overwhelmed when I think of twice the dirty diapers and twice the throw up and even less sleep. And I get a little depressed when I think of having to go places with two carriers (how am I ever going to get around places like grocery shopping?!) My life is going to be a zoo! Then I think about having to get two cribs, two car seats, two bouncers, twice the clothes and bottles, oh man it gets overwhelming! But then I just think of those cute little babies I saw today and how Twin B wouldn't hold still for pictures and the sound of their little hearts. Nothing can prepare you for how special that is and July cannot come fast enough.